Just over one year ago, South Africa went into one of the world’s strictest lockdowns in our efforts to curb the spread of Covid-19 and to save lives. The impact of this lockdown over the last 14 months, across many areas, is well known and documented.
“However, perhaps one of the lesser documented or discussed consequences of the last year has been its impact on the family unit,” says Paula Hildebrand, Chairperson of the South African Association for Social Workers in Private Practice (SAASWIPP).
“Our views on family have been significantly transformed over these last 14 months, with people valuing and longing for connection with others more than ever before,” continues Hildebrand. “Family are not just blood-tied. It’s those that you rely on and love the most. People feel stronger within these bonds and feel that they do not face the challenges alone.”
Whilst many have spent more time with their children and partners or spouses in more restricted social gatherings than ‘normal’, others have embraced technology to virtually fulfil their desire for relational connections and to offer support – be it in terms of caring, financial or just a sharing of lives. Says Hildebrand: “The positive benefit is the rediscovery of each other as people, as a result of intentionally spending time talking and sharing life and fears. Many have found their relationships deepened and more valued as a result of this unusual season.”
However, continues Hildebrand, this time has also showed the weaknesses within families, emphasising disconnects and any lack of healthy relationship practices that existed. In addition, increased substance abuse and domestic violence is of grave concern and, so too, is the constant struggle to find a workable and realistic work/ life balance – more prevalent in the last year than ever before. This has been further compounded by a lack of online resources for some, or assistance with childcare, and other needs, that an easily accessible, extended family is able to offer.
“Reorganising families and changing roles will be part of the changes we should expect in the new normal,” says Hildebrand. South Africa is a highly family-orientated society where family is not just seen as two parents and their children. Extended families are seen as the core family group and they actively engage and assist, if possible.
“This sense of family identity has been strained with social isolation and economic pressure over this time, with the separation of Covid-19 severely hurting the older population,” continues Hildebrand. “Their lack of mobility and being high risk, has meant that their forced isolation has had to be even more adhered to. The lack of touch between old and young is a harming factor that we will see the consequences of for many years as it effects formative development in the young and emotional well-being and longevity in the older generation.”
For many, as mentioned above, work boundaries have also been compromised. There has been a belief that people are available outside of work hours to respond to demands and requests. Says Hildebrand: “The fear of losing one’s job makes this compromise happen easier. The family has priority, I believe, but the management of schooling needs and work demands on the same devices and in the same time frame has made it very hard and emotional/mentally demanding.”
For some, working from home has the benefit of flexibility and adaptability to home demands and recreational activities have been altered in line with the restrictions of Covid-19 to encourage families to spend more time outdoors and in open spaces.
But a large proportion of the population does not have access to digital infrastructure, decent signal or are able to afford South Africa’s high data costs. “We need to be cognisant of the vast inequalities that the pandemic has highlighted in South Africa, and that there are millions of people who do not have access to the digital platforms which have become so essential to maintaining positive connectivity during this time,” says Hildebrand.
Not only is this damaging to those seeking employment during a time when most work requires these tools, but it also leads these individuals to feel even more isolated from their loved ones in comparison to those who are fortunate enough to have the digital tools to communicate often.
Teenagers, however, have been even more drawn to digital entertainment. Says Hildebrand: “We are seeing a challenge in drawing their attention back to schooling needs and face to face social engagement with their families. Whilst digital communications may be less complex and ‘easier’, we are seeing more and more anxious children with social anxiety as a result of this practice. It is difficult to get them to put family first as they strive to maintain a social link with a peer group and fear the consequences if they do not keep that connection.”
At the same time, there have also been beneficial consequences to the various restrictions on movement. Says Hildebrand: “I sincerely hope we learn to value and prize the relationships that surround us more. We hopefully learn to speak well of each other, that kindness becomes the norm in our engagements at home and that the rebirth of family makes us resilient and confident, adding to lives well lived, even under very difficult situations.”
