According to the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG), South Africa’s children are traumatised: apart from our country’s high crime and violence rates, children have witnessed the trauma and loss of the COVID-19 pandemic, the consequences of parents’ unemployment, the fallout of the recent looting and insurrection, and uncertainty about their schooling future.
“If adults have felt anxious, stressed, and have been struggling to navigate the impact of COVID-19 on their mental health, we know that the stress and anxiety is felt even more with our children and adolescents,” says Cassey Chambers, operations director at SADAG.
“SADAG is also concerned about the impact of COVID-19 on the mental health of these young people, who are already an at-risk age group for mental health issues such as depression, anxiety and even suicide. The majority of the calls to the SADAG helplines are from people between the ages of 18 – 35 years old, but we have seen an increase in the number of calls from teens and adolescents recently.
“These calls are soaring because, against the backdrop of all the trauma our children are experiencing, they’re uncertain how to articulate what they’re feeling, how to ask for help, and in many instances, they don’t know who they can turn to for the help they need,” Chambers says.
“As a parent, you are the expert on your child’s behaviour and level of functioning, so you will be the first to notice if any signs of trauma or mental health issues are emerging,” explains psychologist Liane Lurie.
These signs include disorganised behaviour, agitation, a disruption in their sleeping and eating habits, regression in milestones (like toilet training) in younger children, or exaggerated startle responses in situations that they would normally process easily[1]. Other signs could include being aggressive in games, using ‘baby’ talk or even stopping talking altogether, or insisting on avoiding people or places that remind them of a traumatic incident. In older children, signs could include self-harm, withdrawing from activities or relationships in which they usually find joy, or substance abuse.
“Parents need to be both patient and supportive in helping their child or adolescent manage depression and anxiety,” Lurie adds. “It’s important that parents do not see the manifestations of mental illness as intentional or rebellious behaviour. It’s also imperative that the child or adolescent is not punished for things like a decline in academic performance that occurs because of depression.”
Chambers acknowledges that parents are overwhelmed too, but that it’s important to normalise talking about mental health to help break the stigma.“Role models such as Naomi Osaka and Simone Biles, who recently spoke out about their own mental health, have shown us that it’s ok to not be ok – and that it’s ok to take action and seek help,” Chambers says. The helpline is open to people of any groups, and from any walks of life, and is completely free.
“We saw an unprecedented 2,000 calls per day to our helpline, with 5,000 WhatsApps per day during the July 2021 unrest in KwaZulu Natal and Gauteng. This really highlighted to us how many people realised that they needed help – but we know that there are still many more out there who will benefit from counselling,” said Chambers.
“Adolescents and children may be experiencing both post-traumatic stress disorder and current traumatic stress,” Chambers adds. “With no end in sight to this pandemic, they do not know what the future holds and what they can bank on or look forward to. And for many stuck in a cycle of poverty or daily exposure to violence, the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel may feel foreign or even impossible.”
SADAG and Cipla (sponsors of the 24 hours Cipla Mental Health Helpline), offer these tips to parents who suspect that their child may be struggling with mental health challenges, after a particular incident, or even more generally speaking:
Make your child feel safe, whether it’s a cuddle or a hug, or a reassuring hand resting on their back or shoulder – and tell them that they’re safe with you too. It’s also important for you, the parent, to keep as calm as you can.
Open a conversation with your child, asking open-ended questions about what they are thinking and feeling.
Listen to your child calmly, giving them your full attention, without the distractions of devices, media, or other people.
Don’t jump to conclusions, and don’t minimise what they’re feeling or saying. If you’re not sure that you understand what their concerns are, ask more leading questions, such as ‘What do you mean by that?” or “Can you tell me more about this?”. You can also help them by summarizing what they’re saying, by offering “It sounds like what you’re feeling is…” – and let them correct you if you’re wrong.
Share the facts about the incident, if you have them to hand, and talk honestly about it, taking care to correct any misconceptions there may be – particularly those that may have been created by social media.
Be very mindful of the language you use, and avoid blaming or scapegoating particular people or groups. Use neutral and passive language to make this easier.
If it’s appropriate, discuss a plan of action with your child – whether it’s about what to do next to address their mental wellness, or about how to prevent a recurrence of whatever it is that is troubling them. This will most likely help them, and you, deal with the issue at hand.
Where at all possible, restore any routines that your child has, as these are a touchstone of ‘normal’ again, and will likely help them keep calm.
“Most importantly, know when to ask for professional help, whether it’s a mental health professional at your child’s school, or an independent practitioner,” says Lurie.
“There are also so many free resources for children and adults to contact for support, such as Cipla’s free 24-hour counselling helpline,” said CEO of Cipla South Africa, Paul Miller.
Children or parents seeking support for addressing mental health issues can contact the Cipla SADAG 24-hour mental health helpline on 0800 456 789 or via WhatsApp Chat Line (09:00 to 16:00) on 076 882 2775.
